I have a love-hate relationship with MTV's My Super Sweet Sixteen.
At first when it came on, I remember being amused at the lengths parents were willing to go to make sure their child had the best party in town. As if there was any sort of competition. I don't know a whole bunch of people who have thousands of dollars to throw away on one night. But whatever. It's love right? But as the seasons progressed, the parties became more outlandish. The sweet-sixteeners wanted to do something America had never seen before. Thus making it just outright ridiculous. But even with all the oddities, every show follows the same basic format.
It starts out with meeting the little brat (Boy or girl...boys are usually slightly more entertaining and slightly less nauseating). They brag about how turning 16 will change their life completely. Because, you know, now they can drive that fancy fleet of cars that Daddy has been keeping for just such an occasion. And each party has a theme. At first it was your typical theme, like Greek Goddess. Or Pink. But they got a little weirder. Like Barbie In Vegas, Christmas in July, and Skateboard. I'm waiting for the day when we get to "Hotel Bathroom," "The Swamp" and "Crazy Uncle Vic's Prison Cell."
Then usually they send out inviations. But since facebook is so last week and paper is far too cheap, they usually give out some kind of trinket that shamelessly promotes themselves in some way. Like a CD of them singing. Or a deck of cards with their latest photo shoot. As the seasons pass, again, running out of ideas. One girl solicited Emanuel Lewis to go with her. One girl rented an ice cream truck. She didn't actually give out ice cream, but necklaces. I would just be horribly, horribly disappointed. It's like putting your money in the pop machine for cherry coke zero and getting a bottled water when you need to stay up all night. Not the same.
Then, because they don't have any REAL friends, they have to hold auditions for somebody who will escort them to their party, and actually pay them to do so. So after making them lose some of their clothes and most of their dignity, they pick someone, acting of course like it is such an honor to be able to ride in a pink limo, walk down a red carpet, or come galloping in on an elephant with them. They also usually have a VIP group, about 4 girls who worship the ground that they walk on, in exchange for the ability to dance on the stage for about 5 minutes. Some girls go as far to buy their VIP group dresses, since obviously they couldn't be trusted to dress themselves.
Then they have to find something for themselves to wear. Their parents usually take them to outlandish places so they can find something that nobody else has (because, heaven forbid you wear the same color as a commoner). So Mommy Dearest goes with, makes a big production about not wanting to spend so much money on a dress, and then ends up buying them three, because you just can't wear ONE dress for a WHOLE night. Again, some girls are a little more eclectic. For $70, you can purchase a pair of Nike sneakers...for $700, they will add a little extra paint on one side. Because then nobody else has a pair like these.
Before going home for the day, they go look at an expensive mode of transportation. Well, except one girl. Who just wanted a custom-made bike. And told her parents that if she didn't get it, her entire life up to this point would have been a lie. Obviously. Again, Mommy and Daddy say no to whatever they like. And as always, at the party, Mommy and Daddy have a surprise for them. They act shocked, like they don't see it coming. And then they get whatever they asked for. Like the customized bike overnighted for $1000. And also a range rover, because the bike was cheap.
Usually something goes wrong at the party. Somebody sneaks in, or tips over the cake, or Mom and Dad pretend they didn't get a car, so there is always a temper tantrum. This is usually my favorite part, because I enjoy watching the parents get out of sorts becuase their little angel is suddenly unhappy on the biggest day of their lives. But the day is usually saved when some expensive band shows up and gives a concert. At the end, they flash a grand total of how much was spent on the parties. It's absolutely obscene for one night for one person.
But will I continue to watch it and hate it? Of course.
